Unfriended — Losing a friend

Something that we don’t talk about enough is the pain of losing a friendship, rather than a romantic relationship.

In my life, I’ve only have one really solid friendship that I felt like I could be entirely myself in, outside of my family and my husband. This person was someone I could tell anything to, and we could talk for hours. Now, I’m not normally a talkative person, but with this person I was.

This friendship began in high school, and we had our ups and downs, but she remained the one person I kept coming back to as my best friend. One thing that I remember is we had this weird voice we would use, only with each other, and to this day I can’t recreate it, but anytime I saw her it immediately came back to me.

We stayed close for the first year I was in college, but after that first year, she ghosted me. I would try to text her every once in a while, but I no longer received responses. Or if I did, it was a week later, and then I’d respond and get nothing to that.

I’m pretty sure she had some severe social anxiety going on, but honestly, I’ll never know, because any time I since have tried to reach out, I’ve gotten crickets.

The feeling of losing this friendship was one of the hardest things for me to accept. Because it wasn’t like either of us had done anything wrong, or made the decision to not be friends anymore, we just weren’t. And I think that not having any kind of closure makes the whole thing that much worse.